HOUSTON
2007
Whistle Down The Wind
It had been maybe 8 years since being on tour
It was fun getting to hang out with people
Make new friends after rehearsal
One of the things about being on tour
is most times you're in the same hotel
Feels a little bit like living in the dorms in college
This first stop on tour
We were in a nice hotel
Open atrium design
with trees in the middle
You could see the lobby and most the rooms from the hallway
Here's the thing
Sometimes
I sleepwalk
Not frequently
But enough that he has a name
Bear
Not a scary bear
Think, more like Winnie the Pooh
He can climb stairs
Do some mundane tasks
He might take a bite out of the cheddar cheese
or
Leave an open peanut butter jar on the counter
Bear is fond of peanut butter
Though not fully conscious Bear gets around fairly well
Especially if he knows his environment
It's happened since I was a kid
This first night in Houston
Bear rolls out of bed
Starts to wander
In this new hotel room
Instead of finding something yummy to eat
Bear finds himself
in a brightly lit hallway
Confused
Behind him he hears a loud
KTHUNK
The door has closed
He turns to open the door
But it won't open
He tries and tries and tries but it WON'T OPEN!
It's LOCKED
Bear takes this as his cue to dissipate
Disappear as it were
Whereupon I awaken
Standing under harsh lights in
TIGHTY WHITEYS
Locked out of my room
In the hallway of a fancy open atrium hotel
Actually, NOT so TIGHTY WHITEY but more like Droopy, Fruit of the Looms
SHIT
Looking around panicked I find USA TODAY at my feet
Pick it up and cover myself, looking right and left
Someone wearing a hotel uniform approaches
"Help" I whimper
It's probably good that Bear wears DROOPY LOOMYS
If he wore the t-shirt and no bottoms of Winnie the Pooh
Might have ended up in jail
Friday, January 31, 2020
Wednesday, January 29, 2020
JOURNEY
FT Atkinson, WI
Fireside Dinner Theatre
January 1st 1996
8am
Head splitting
Took a long pull of water
Climbed into my friends' Toyota Celica
Alone
Snow slowly falling
Peaceful
and pretty
but there were many miles to cover
Slammed the door
Started the engine and took off
WISCONSIN
Snow
MINNESOTA
Snow
NORTH DAKOTA
Snow
MONTANA
Snow flakes flying right at you
Then parting as the Celica hurled down the road at 80mph
It was somewhere in Montana that it became hypnotic
The background was black
with white spots swirling around
Couldn't sleep
Didn't want to
There was a picture of my black lab Lucy
Taped to the dash
She was sitting on the front porch
Waiting for me to come home
Well, I did stop the car and closed my eyes for three hours in Montana
The wind buffeted the car
It was cold
Really cold,
My buddy needed me to drive his car back
He left for a last minute concert opportunity
Sure, I said
But 20 plus hours in I was gripping the steering wheel
Hard
Pulled over to puke once
The constant thick blanket of white was mesmerizing
Hour after hour
Somewhere in Montana I began to feel dispirited
Why am I pursuing theatre?
Why am I in this distant tundra alone?
I was pondering quitting performing
A song comes on the CD player I'd never before heard
It was a spiritual moment
I drove on, tears rolling down my face
I was aware I was in an altered state
Hours upon hours of staring at the same scenery
It felt like God was speaking to me
Directly
Onward I flew down the highway
IDAHO
Snow
I crossed into Washington ELATED
My home state
Then it stopped snowing and dense fog rolled in
Could hardly see 10 yards in front of the car
Went from 80mph to 30mph
and that was probably too fast
but when you've been doing 80plus for about 30 hours
It's a hard transition
Got up and over the Cascade Mountain range
The skies clear
Hit 60mph
and Seattle rush hour traffic
5MPH
Bout 12 miles from my Shoreline home
Took over an hour
All in all the trip took 36 hours
But
IT DID COME
A couple months later I booked a National Tour and my career began
Fireside Dinner Theatre
January 1st 1996
8am
Head splitting
Took a long pull of water
Climbed into my friends' Toyota Celica
Alone
Snow slowly falling
Peaceful
and pretty
but there were many miles to cover
Slammed the door
Started the engine and took off
WISCONSIN
Snow
MINNESOTA
Snow
NORTH DAKOTA
Snow
MONTANA
Snow flakes flying right at you
Then parting as the Celica hurled down the road at 80mph
It was somewhere in Montana that it became hypnotic
The background was black
with white spots swirling around
Couldn't sleep
Didn't want to
There was a picture of my black lab Lucy
Taped to the dash
She was sitting on the front porch
Waiting for me to come home
Well, I did stop the car and closed my eyes for three hours in Montana
The wind buffeted the car
It was cold
Really cold,
My buddy needed me to drive his car back
He left for a last minute concert opportunity
Sure, I said
But 20 plus hours in I was gripping the steering wheel
Hard
Pulled over to puke once
The constant thick blanket of white was mesmerizing
Hour after hour
Somewhere in Montana I began to feel dispirited
Why am I pursuing theatre?
Why am I in this distant tundra alone?
I was pondering quitting performing
A song comes on the CD player I'd never before heard
If ever you are feeling like you're tired
And all your uphill struggles leave you headed downhill
If you realize your wildest dreams can hurt you
And your appetite for pain has drinken it's fill
And all your uphill struggles leave you headed downhill
If you realize your wildest dreams can hurt you
And your appetite for pain has drinken it's fill
I ask of you a very simple question
Did you think for one minute that you are alone
And is your suffering a privilege you share only
Or did you think that everybody else feels completely at home
Did you think for one minute that you are alone
And is your suffering a privilege you share only
Or did you think that everybody else feels completely at home
Just wait
Just wait
Just wait
And it will come
Just wait
Just wait
And it will come
If you think I've given up on you you're crazy
And if you think I don't love you well then you're just wrong
In time you just might take to feeling better
Time is the beauty of the road being long
And if you think I don't love you well then you're just wrong
In time you just might take to feeling better
Time is the beauty of the road being long
I know that now you feel no consolation
But maybe if I told you and informed you out loud
I say this without fear of hesitation
I can honestly tell you that you make me proud
But maybe if I told you and informed you out loud
I say this without fear of hesitation
I can honestly tell you that you make me proud
I drove on, tears rolling down my face
I was aware I was in an altered state
Hours upon hours of staring at the same scenery
It felt like God was speaking to me
Directly
Onward I flew down the highway
IDAHO
Snow
I crossed into Washington ELATED
My home state
Then it stopped snowing and dense fog rolled in
Could hardly see 10 yards in front of the car
Went from 80mph to 30mph
and that was probably too fast
but when you've been doing 80plus for about 30 hours
It's a hard transition
Got up and over the Cascade Mountain range
The skies clear
Hit 60mph
and Seattle rush hour traffic
5MPH
Bout 12 miles from my Shoreline home
Took over an hour
All in all the trip took 36 hours
But
IT DID COME
A couple months later I booked a National Tour and my career began
Monday, January 13, 2020
TIMMY
"So, it's my Stag Party. Can you make it?"
It's a long way away
A long way
"Yeah but my car insurance just lapsed."
"I'll pay it."
It was a 10 hour drive
To London
Ontario
There were accidents along the way
So maybe more like 14 hours
Made it
1994 Thunderbird
I was nervous the whole way
But I got there
Canadian bachelor parties
are so civilized
It was fun
We spent a hot minute at a strip club
Cooked some ribs
I only knew Timmy
But his friends were awesome
They all flossed after eating
Canadians
When I was leaving
Timmy said, "Wait."
Gave me the money for my insurance
It was not insignificant
I'll never forget it
Never
It's a long way away
A long way
"Yeah but my car insurance just lapsed."
"I'll pay it."
It was a 10 hour drive
To London
Ontario
There were accidents along the way
So maybe more like 14 hours
Made it
1994 Thunderbird
I was nervous the whole way
But I got there
Canadian bachelor parties
are so civilized
It was fun
We spent a hot minute at a strip club
Cooked some ribs
I only knew Timmy
But his friends were awesome
They all flossed after eating
Canadians
When I was leaving
Timmy said, "Wait."
Gave me the money for my insurance
It was not insignificant
I'll never forget it
Never
Thursday, January 9, 2020
MY FIRST BEST FRIEND
Lance is what I called him
Though his name was Lancer
Black lab
As true to me as anyone I've known
We played together
Took naps
Bonded
I was 5 and 6 and 7 and 8
We'd hang out all day
Maybe watch some tv
Go for a couple walks
He wasn't as much into fetch as most labs
I was cool with that
Sometimes when I was dramatic
and decided it was time to hit the road and live as hobos
He was by my side
While I sat beneath the evergreen tree around the corner
He was there
When I eventually got hungry
He guided me home
He was my first best friend
Lance
Though his name was Lancer
Black lab
As true to me as anyone I've known
We played together
Took naps
Bonded
I was 5 and 6 and 7 and 8
We'd hang out all day
Maybe watch some tv
Go for a couple walks
He wasn't as much into fetch as most labs
I was cool with that
Sometimes when I was dramatic
and decided it was time to hit the road and live as hobos
He was by my side
While I sat beneath the evergreen tree around the corner
He was there
When I eventually got hungry
He guided me home
He was my first best friend
Lance
Wednesday, January 8, 2020
KANSAS CITY STARLIGHT
It was a monsoon that lasted 2 days
I'd hardly ever seen rain like that
It was like a river out of the sky
The first night the sound electrician refused to power up the board
That is one of the very few nights where a show was cancelled in my life
Next night the conditions were no different
Rain
Torrential
Oh, this is an outdoor theatre
That seats just shy of 8 Thousand
It's pouring
I think no way
But the crew
Did what crews do
and
I don't know, bubble wrapped and electrician tapped everything?
Still
The expectation was that the show would be cancelled...again
Nope
Let me remind you that this was literally a monsoon
and
We were performing in an outdoor amphitheater
When told we were doing the show, I thought, FOR WHO?
Who is going to show up for an out door show in a monsoon?
Kansas City that's who
They did
They filled the place up
and
We did the show
to people in full rain gear
holding umbrellas
not too well
against the storm
but they were there
They Were There
I'd hardly ever seen rain like that
It was like a river out of the sky
The first night the sound electrician refused to power up the board
That is one of the very few nights where a show was cancelled in my life
Next night the conditions were no different
Rain
Torrential
Oh, this is an outdoor theatre
That seats just shy of 8 Thousand
It's pouring
I think no way
But the crew
Did what crews do
and
I don't know, bubble wrapped and electrician tapped everything?
Still
The expectation was that the show would be cancelled...again
Nope
Let me remind you that this was literally a monsoon
and
We were performing in an outdoor amphitheater
When told we were doing the show, I thought, FOR WHO?
Who is going to show up for an out door show in a monsoon?
Kansas City that's who
They did
They filled the place up
and
We did the show
to people in full rain gear
holding umbrellas
not too well
against the storm
but they were there
They Were There
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